I have to apologise for the doom and gloom around these parts lately. I'm really in a strange place right now. On the one hand, I'm really calm and mellow about this cycle. I know what to expect, I'm feeling good.
But on the other hand, this cycle feels like it has more at stake. More sadness, if it doesn't take. More waiting around if it does, waiting to see how long we wait before we try again. It's affecting me at work too; I feel preoccupied, that I'm just going through the motions. I'm doing the best I can, but it feels a little harder this time.
Tomorrow is the start of double injections. Lucrin has been going fine; now we're adding in the Puregon. Last cycle, I took 125 each day. This time, I'm taking 175 x 4 days, then dropping to 150 for several more. The goal is to get a better response than last time, but not to get TOO high, as I'm still at a higher risk for hyper stimulation thanks to my stupid bung ovaries. It's time to cross my fingers and hope my reproductive organs do their job properly.
Oh, I have been there. The second cycle is really hard in different ways. Hang in there! You can do this.
ReplyDeleteLots of strength and good thoughts for you!!
ReplyDeleteI can see that this time feels so much scarier because of the effort you have been through! I was useless at work for most of IVF too. Don't worry about it. Your kids will be fine. When is your first monitoring appt?
ReplyDeleteFXd with you... sending you thoughts and wishes always... hope this is the cycle and there is no need for anymore waiting xoxo
ReplyDeleteSending you lots of positive thoughts and hugs!!!!
ReplyDeleteIt's so hard when you're trying to be 'present' at work, but your mind is thinking 10 billion little things about your IVF cycle. Take strength from within and you will be ok. One day at a time.
ReplyDeletePraying for you, sweet girl. TONS of love from Chicago.
ReplyDelete