34 weeks + 4 days

This morning saw me head to the hospital for monitoring, as I hadn't felt baby girl move too much in the wee hours of the evening or this morning. Everything was okay - despite not having any huge movements during the trace, her heartbeat showed appropriate base lines and accelerations - so could well just be positioning or a quiet day. I'm back home now and monitoring some more, but I'll just see my OB as per normal on Friday if all goes well.

Despite the fright, I'm glad I went in. It ties in nicely to something (not so nice) that's been on my mind during these last few days - which is an irrational fear of something happening to the baby in the home stretch of this pregnancy.

I know it feels silly; we've beaten so many hurdles so far already. From surviving a first trimester where we were sure it was all over, the bleeds, the scares - to the bed resting and threat of pre-term labour early in the third trimester. But the fear of something going wrong now, or of baby being stillborn, it is a real thing.

I think a lot of it comes from seeing information scattered on social media, about stories and awareness. It's so important, yes - but it scares me. I just want this baby to get through the last few weeks of pregnancy (if we can stretch that far!) and come out the other side in our arms, safe and sound.

Almost 35 weeks... come on, baby girl. We can do this!

4 Comments • Labels: , , ,  


Feisty Harriet said...

Go baby! Go Momma!

And also hugs for everyone.


dublinerinDeutschland said...

Not so long to go now, hang in there!

Jess said...

I also remember the feeling of anxiety in those last weeks, despite having nothing like the complications you've had so far. I actually wonder if the complications make the anxiety now feel even more fraught somehow. Like--we've come this far, we've survived this much, if the baby were born now she would likely be totally healthy, and so please don't let some freak horrible incident happen now to destroy everything. The feelings are totally normal, but I'm sorry you're going through that--I know how scary it is. Glad you got the reassurance you needed today.

Unknown said...

Almost there! Just pay attention and go with your instincts like you have been and before you know it you'll have your bubs in your arms- you've totally got this!

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