A few days ago, I was out on the quadrangle getting ready for my regular lunchtime playground duty, when I was approached by a kindergarten student. Turns out she had been given some kind of fortune cookie inside her lunchbox that day, and she wanted me to read out what the message inside of the biscuit said.

Just imagine my surprise when I unfolded and read the paper;

"You will be successful and talented in bed."

Oh, my. Thankfully I had read it in my head before blurting it out to the little girl! Trying to mask my shock, I shared the first part with her and left out the latter. I wonder what her mum would think, had she seen her daughter's fortune that day ...

I decided to look into my own future, thanks to Bad Cookie. The verdict?

"You have an unusually repulsive personality.

Ouch - bad cookie indeed. Click the link, and share your own fortunes with us all in the comments. I promise not to judge!

[It's our last day of school for the week. It's only 6.30am and I'm already deciding between throwing a tantrum or bawling my eyes out, because it's a certain time of the month and damnit, everything is frustrating me today. Plus it's going to rain. Which means I'll end up doing playground duty on my rostered one day off playground duty. It's certainly shaping up to be wonderful. Definitely the kind of day to drag out one of my kidlet posts before I mope around a little more.]

This one should probably be titled "Overheard on the Oval" instead of the classroom, as that was where we held our infants Athletics carnival last week.

Quoted one girl as she hopped into a sack, ready to start racing;

"Oh, I feel so good in the sack."

I think she's announcing that just a couple of years too early, in my humble opinion. And also, I apparently have my mind in the gutter.

(Wait . . . I've just realised that my international readers might not appreciate the humour in that statement: to be "good in the sack" usually means to be "good in bed." Or something. Perhaps you can google it?)

It's always a classic when my kidlets do speeches about a topic of their choice, because you hear some hilariously funny (and hilariously terrible) results.

Today's topic? Healthy eating. Very appropriate, what with my current health kick and all. Here's the good advice one of my kidlets came up with;

"Eat healthy foods and they will help you to get NOT fat."

If only it were that easy, eh? I'd be not fat already.

"Miss S is like a friend to me."

Very sweet, oh yes.

Conveniently stated too, as we just discussed parent-teacher interview times.

Funny that.

[The following was taken from a writing prompt activity. Just imagine a paper with scribbles, frantic eraser marks and a whole lot of spelling mistakes.]

"If you don't clean up the environment, the germs will get out and they will kill you. And then people will die. Because of the germs."

Right you are, kiddo. Right you are. Gotta watch those germs.

The following excerpt was taken from a student's spelling book;

"A Diplodocus is a plait eating dinosaur."

Be afraid, girls. Be very afraid.

The setting: My pretty classroom.
The characters: Yours truly, a visiting classroom teacher and the kidlets.
The background: The teacher asked if she could lock her bag away in my storeroom, and a little polite conversation followed afterwards.

Kidlet #1: [shocked voice] Mrs S is friends with Mrs X!
Kidlet #2: [snotty voice] Well of COURSE she is. Where else would she find a friend?

Apparently I'm more of a social recluse than I thought, if the idea of me having friends shocks my kidlets to the core. And also, notice I am married?

(To myself, but not the point.)