Sunday Scribblings: Instructions

How appropriate; my Year 1/2 class has been learning about procedures all term. My turn to do something different, though.

I guess there are many ways to take the "Instructions" prompt, but I'll take it as I see it. Remember - always start each step of your method with a verb, kids!

How to begin a lifestyle change, in 10 easy steps!

Things You Need;
A Mirror, Self-Consciousness, Some cash stashed away, Motivation and Enthusiasm. Or at least one of the above. But definitely the cash.

Step One;
Decide that your current efforts aren't working. Have a good cry to anyone who will listen, and decide to try something new.

Step Two;
Spot an ad on television while you are running and watching Oprah (preferably at the same time) which shows a sure-fire (and probably expensive) eating programme to help lose weight.

Step Three;
Ring the fore-mentioned company. Check out menu, food looks good, decide "What the heck?" and go for it.

Step Four;
Read out credit card numbers. Buy programme for one week trial. Feel guilty for spending, but excited for being pro-active. Anticipate the food that will be delivered.

Step Five;
Walk past womens gym that has opened in local shopping centre. Pop in, be mesmerised by the circuit course, be sucked in by the helpful store owner, and walk out - with a 12 month membership. Ka-Ching!

Step Six;
Eat healthy food. Eat normal food too. Have fun eating, and NOT being on a diet.

Step Seven;
(Optional) Attend line dancing course, jump around like a crazy woman with no co-ordination, but have a wonderful time. Win raffle - that's a free class next time! Hoorah!

Step Eight;
Dig up mother's old line dancing music, and practice sporadically at home. (Decide to teach your class at school said dances, and become tremendously excited.)

Step Nine;
Go to gym every day for training sessions. Sweat and pant and turn red.

Step Ten;
Complain about stiffness. Have lovely partner give sports massage. Fail to stop talking about being a gym member to anyone who will listen. Enjoy it!

10 Comments • Labels:  


Autrice said...

LOL - I just wish I could be active enough to line dance, now!

megg said...

I can't wait to hear the end of the story!! I miss Oprah - we don't get her over here.

swampgrrl said...

hahaha...i love this!
what a funny person you are.
will you be my new best friend??!!!

Paris Parfait said...

Very cute post. Good for you for taking such positive steps.

Don said...

Very funny!

Brenda said...

You made me smile!

tongue in cheek said...

I know I would be red if I went to the gym!! Nevertheless, thanks for the challenge!

TI said...

Good luck with your new lifestyle.

dorinny said...

Except for the line dancing, this sounds great! My brother has gone through these same steps over the last few weeks and he's really a changed person (minus the line dancing) :P

bonnie said...

Very cute and motivating! I'll bet you are a great teacher, as well.

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